I got a text from him last Friday saying that he’s going out for a while. He does this a lot and I’m fine with it. People do need their space but I just can’t believe that I accept it now. That people need space. I never thought that you needed breaks from people you love. Maybe I still don’t believe that.
When we met yesterday after his break, he looked the same, he loved the same and he smiled at me while he took his first sip of coffee and said it needed more sugar just like always. But. . . .
Can you love someone and not love them just enough? Unfortunately I think it’s possible. That’s what we were. He loved me but just not enough to hold me close. We just had a brief conversation and I was silent mostly. And when he thought something might be off he asked me what is going on with me? I chose not to reply and I just asked him something
Did you miss me while you were away? Did you miss me at all? He didn’t say anything for a while and just continued to stare into my face, motionless. He loves his space, his solitude, he loves him more. And I can’t do that, I can’t be the person who loves someone more than myself and be with a person who loves themselves more than me. Because it just feels so unfair.
Can someone love you but not love you enough?
Yes. . . . .! And yes . . . . . . It’s painful!
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