Being in love with someone who’s not in love with you is punishment. My Ammi said this to me years ago and I instantly knew she was talking about herself and Abbu, but I just didn’t know who was the person who was in love until one day Abbu packed his bags and left. That day Ammi started packing a bag underneath her eyes and she had those with her until the day she died. After seeing what love can do to people I swore to God that I’ll never fall in love and that was broken the day I met you.
I remember that someone once told me, you transform in love. When in love you are the whole world and the world is you and sometimes it only takes a name, your lovers name to change your body into oceans, riverbeds and landslides and now I know that true because….
Every time I hear your name being called out it’s like the tectonic plates inside my body just shifted whilst there’s a tsunami forming above my navel and it’s snowing down the artic of my belly button while a gasping tornado just struck the Mexican walls of my rib cages as the African caves inside my throat is gasping for breath. And even though this is punishment I don’t mind being the world because love makes me universal and I’m so in love with you, I’m so in love that I now know how Ammi might have felt when she packed all those bags underneath her eyes just to be in love.
© The Rendezvous Club 2020
All Rights Reserved!